Christians are straight up FREAKS
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
