Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
