The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
