Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize