Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
