He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
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