Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
