No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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