Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize