i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
