I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
