I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
