So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
