i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
