You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
