So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
