Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize