so that wasnt chicken after all
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize