I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
