i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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