My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
