She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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