Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
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