maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
