So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
