the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
