I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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