ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
