yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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