before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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