I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
