Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
