At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
