Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
