Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
