just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
