Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
