I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
