Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
