this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i came on her dog
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
