Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
you are never too drunk for berry picking
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
