with your own penis?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
sex in a hospital.. check
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
