Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
