so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
