Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
