Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize