Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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