We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
