If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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