So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize