So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
