He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
