I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Randomize
