yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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